All I have ever wanted is to be loved and excepted by my family.  It is hard when your parents make it known that you are not the favorite.  Are parents suppose to have favorite children? or do they pretend to love each one in their own special way.  At least pretend that I am special also.  I wonder why I am so insecure, it goes clear back to the day I realized, they were not going to protect me or lift me up when I fall.  I try so hard to have a relationship with my parents, at this time I have bent over backwards to be there for them.  You cannot keep giving love that is not ever given back.  It falls on fallow ground.  I have tried to break up the soil and try try again to no avail.